Saturday, November 8, 2008

Life, mine that is........part 1

OK I was thinking I would use this blog as a way to put my life on paper and try to help me to move on and not live in the past. My life has been hard is one way to put it. I am not very good at this. Let's me start at the beginning. My parents were married almost five years before I was born and my dad had worked all over the southern states he worked in the oil field at the time. My mom was from a poor family. Her dad was a drunk never had a job and her mom raised her children the best she could. My mom's family was big there were 13 kids in all but only 10 living. She was the youngest girl and had a hard life growing up. She quit school in the 12th grade a Christmas break and married my dad. I think because she wanted to have a better life. While living at home she never had lights, running water or a bathroom in the house. Her dad was mean and a bad person he did things to his wife and kids that NO one should ever have to go through. My grandmother died only 8 months after my mom moved out. My mom blames herself because she was not there to help her mom from being beat by her drunk husband. That was August of 1969 my grandfather lived until 1974. I never knew my grandmother and was only 1 when my grandfather died.

My dad's family was close growing up. His father was a hard worker and a good father and husband. They lived in town and had all the things my mother never had growing up. My grandmother was "spoiled" by my grandfather she never drove or paid bill or worked out side the home. While I was growing up was always had Sunday dinner at their house and everyone was there. It is one of the few great memories I have growing up. MY grandmother never liked my mom. From what I understand it was because she was "just a poor girl from a bad family" kind of thing. My two aunt's my dad's sister's always made thing hard for my mom and that always cause problems for my mom while I was growing up. My grandfather died of cancer in 1982 on Christmas day. It is a time I will never forget the first time I ever remember seeing my dad cry. My grandmother lived from small apartment to small apartment for years and the family we had was never the same. Everyone fought over all the material things that my grandparents had. In around 1992 or 1993 they put her in a nursing home she had altimers (spelled wrong) and slowly she forgot who we all were. She became just a shell lying there in the bed and sleeping all the time. She pasted away in Dec. 1997.

My parents married on Dec 1968. I was born in Jan 1973. They lived in Fernwood, MS in a small house my dad worked at the same place he still works at today. It is a box factory in Magnolia. Last month he was there I think 38 years. They have always had a "rocky" marriage. Next month they will be married 40 years but they fight more with just words these day then fist every single day of their lives. In July 1974 just 18 months after I was born my little brother Billy was born. We moved to the county out side of Magnolia and lived there for around 5 years and moved back to Fernwood where my parents still live today. My life growing up was hard at times as I said before my parents have never had a good marriage. Growning up I can remember times when Billy and I would sit in our rooms and listen to the fighting. There was the time many of them that we (mom, Billy and I ) would leave and stay with someone for weeks at the time and then we would go back. There was the time I guess I was around 8 I can remember we left and went to a women and children shelter in Jackson ofcourse mom and dad were going to get a divorce and they where going to help us start a new life. Daddy found us and we went back home. Don't get me wrong BOTH of my parents are to fault for the way they raised me and Billy. Billy had alot of problems he got in trouble all the time for fighting. We lived right across the street from the school 1-6 grades. It was easy for him to do something wrong and just go home and mom always defended him. He got blamed for a lot of stuff that he didn't do but he did do his share of stuff.
I think I am going to stop here today I'll try to get back soon.....